Dr. Seuss and Dos Equis

This Cinco de Mayo my Silvia strays
Far into the moonlit alleyways
Guided by a cold beer,
Belching Holy Shakespeare.
 
Marinated eyes boldly blaze
Into sonnets when she plays
Her words beheaded where teeth meet:
“I know that Shakespeare’s one to beat.”
 
“But in my room what can I learn?
That flowers bloom and candles burn?
That Ronald Reagan’s on TV
Still with his monkey (you or me?).”
 
“Did Joan of Arc iron her clothes?
And bound by books do you suppose
That its likely I would find
Decent answers?  Any kind?”
 
Our mouths are full of Fritos and Cheetos,
And just for a change, Nacho Doritos,
While sucking down a Coke and brew.
When we get lucky, Ganjah, too.
 
So all our hours slip away,
But nothing ever seems to stay.
I know that more of your Superior
Is guaranteed to make us cheerier.
 
Come on and open-up another brew!
And while you’re at it can you make it two?
To night-time hours, admission-free,
My Cinco de Mayo, here’s to Thee!
 
“For dinner later, you and I
Can dine on my tamale pie.
Then for dessert, I promise we share
A luscious, sticky Gummy Bear.”
 
She licks the onion, bites the worm,
And fondles fire to make it squirm!
I ask that she should hold it down
Before the cops can come around.
 
She takes the law into her hand
To frisk the verse and, worse, to rhyme unplanned:
“Come on, you pussy!
Look at me.
Where is your sense
Of decadence?”
 
With lip-lashing, sweat-smashing gladness
We part and merge in madness.
A siren sounds!  Clutching our clothes,
We steal away, to limp repose.
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