grant's vision


        I am in the presence of the pure radiance of God.  There is nothing else I can see.  I feel infinitesimal.  I am saying,

        “Please, God, I have done a terrible thing.  I know it was wrong.  Please forgive me.  I will never do it again.”

        I wait for His response.  Then I hear, feel Him.


        Then silence.

        And then,


        I say, “OK.  I guess I’ve got it coming.  Bring it on.”

        Jesus Christ emerges bearing his cross.  He wears his crown of thorns.  Blood streams down his face.  He says nothing to me.

        Roman soldiers whip him and Jesus drops his cross.  Jesus collapses and rolls onto the cross.  The Roman soldiers nail him to the cross where he lies in agony.  The Roman soldiers raise him up upon the cross.  They beat the hell out of Jesus Christ.

        I realize that Jesus Christ is being punished for my sin.  I drop to my knees and I beg,

        “Please, God, stop!”

        But the crucifixion goes on.

        “He didn’t do anything but love everyone!”

        A Roman soldier stabs Jesus in the side and blood pours out.

        “Kill me instead!”

        Jesus raises his head and looks me in the eyes and he says in a reassuring voice,

        “Don’t worry, Grant.  I’ve got this.”

        His head drops and he dies.

        I don’t feel free.

        I feel dirty.

        I feel guilty.

        If we had to watch Jesus being crucified for us whenever we sinned we would never sin again.


In essence told to me by my brother Grant






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